Life with the Babe

Tomorrow little Jones will be two weeks old, and I can categorically say that it has been the best/hardest/longest/shortest two weeks of my life! I give him a million kisses every day.

Some details from the last couple of weeks:
- Breastfeeding has been really freaking hard! There was a lot of crying and a few punches thrown into the headboard of the bed. At one point I an absolutely convinced that if there had been any formula in the house, Jones would now be bottle fed. I was so ready to give up, but things have been going better so let's hope it keeps up! (Shout out to my chiropractor, Dr. John Sorenson at Advanced Care Chiropractic - his adjustments are what have done the trick in helping with breastfeeding!)
- Alex is THE BEST EVER. He has been so supportive (even when I'm sobbing while breastfeeding and he has no idea what to say), so helpful, and is already the best papa I could ever imagine for our little man. It has blown me away how much more in love with him I am - I didn't even think that was possible. The few times I have become totally overwhelmed, Alex has jumped in without hesitation to help and I love that he doesn't freak out when the baby cries. He doesn't just hand him back or panic, he just snuggles with him and calms him down. Best.
- The baby blues SUCKED, but I have been pretty great these last few days so I'm pretty sure they're all gone - hooray! I can only imagine what post partum depression must be like, and I am incredibly sympathetic to those who suffer with it. 10 days of baby blues was the most I could handle.
- We have been asked a lot where the name came from and, honestly, I don't know! I just remember texting Alex a few months ago asking if he liked Jones and he said yes so I put it on the list! Then when he was here he just looked like Jones to me. We had a couple others in the running, but Jones just fits his cool personality. Maxwell comes from Alex's brother.
- I have been so grateful to amazing friends and family for help, support and love. We are incredibly blessed!

These little feet slay me every day. They are adorable. 

Jones Maxwell Theobald

The Birth Story of Jonesy!

         Monday night/Tuesday morning (May 28th) I woke up at 3 am to my water breaking – a slow leak that continued for a couple of hours. Contractions started immediately but were spaced apart and not too intense. I tried to sleep but was too jazzed up so I couldn’t for a couple of hours. I told Alex to go to work because my labor was still pretty mild and didn’t want him to meaninglessly miss a day, especially since we wanted him to take a week off after the baby came. I labored throughout the day, but was able to take care of some things. I bought a baby swing and took Otis to the park for a walk at the park, where I had to stop several times because the contractions were pretty hard. Alex got home from work and in the early evening the contractions started getting more intense and closer together. I had been timing them for most of the day (on a handy-dandy app on my phone) and they were now averaging under 5 minutes apart, usually closer to 3 minutes, and I was having to breathe through them. All I wanted to eat was some tortilla soup from Café Rio so we headed over there but on the way I realized it was a bad idea because my contractions were becoming really uncomfortable. Alex ran in and grabbed the food and we came home to eat. I couldn’t eat much and this is kind of the time I have in my mind for when I thought, “ok, we’re going to have a baby tonight”.

            For the next several hours I labored pretty hard but with my water having broken, we wanted to wait as long as possible for the first vaginal exam due to risk of infection. My midwife said that once she did the first exam, we had 12 hours until the baby had to come out. I felt like I had labored pretty hard for several hours so at 11:30 pm she checked me: baby was still high, only 3 cm, 50% effaced. That was SO disheartening and I cried at the lack of progress I had made. I continued to labor, even more intensely, over the next several hours. (My midwife later described this time as “brutal labor” to the doctor, which was incredibly validating!) The contractions were so hard and I felt that for sure I was making amazing progress: I was picturing my baby moving down, my cervix opening. I labored backwards on the toilet for a while and that was one of my favorite positions. If I was not on the toilet I almost always wanted to squat through a contraction, and I felt like it helped me picture the baby coming down and out. Alex was beyond amazing through this whole process. He pushed on my back, supported me while I was squatting, held me and talked me through what I needed to do. Labor was so intimate for us and we kissed often, though we were both exhausted.

            My two sisters and sister-in-law were also there and they were an amazing support to me. My sister-in-law has studied massage therapy and she did some fantastic work on my back and showed Alex what to do as well. I was incredibly grateful for her and my sisters – it was comforting to be there with women who had done this before and knew what I was going through.

            I’m not sure the exact time, but somewhere around 2 or 3 my midwife got called on another birth - #11 for the woman, so it would be incredibly fast and she would be back within a few hours, even though she had to drive to Cedar City. I felt comfortable with her leaving because my sister has delivered babies before so if it came to that, we could handle it. And secretly I hoped it would come to that. Before she left I was checked again and I was at 4cm and 70%. I wanted more, but let myself bask in the progress and kept a positive attitude. By now I had been laboring for 24 hours and had gotten only a few hours of sleep during that time, so everyone suggested we try to get some sleep. We laid down and slept for maybe an hour. The contractions were still hard but they got a little farther apart. When I worried they were getting too far apart I made myself get out of bed and went to the bathtub, where they slowed even more. So I got out and walked around the whole house, willing them to come back. But much to my dismay, they slowed even more, and became so mild I could talk through them. I chatted with my sister about what to do and all the while felt incredibly calm about the decision I was about to make.

            My midwife returned and checked me again and I had made no progress at all. By this point it was about 6 hours since the first exam and I had been in labor for about 27 hours. I was exhausted, Alex was exhausted, my body was done. I felt that if we didn’t go to the hospital and just tried to ride it out that I would wait too long, get too exhausted and would have to have a c-section because of the length of time since the water had broken. I asked everyone to give Alex and me some time to discuss our decision, and we cried together as we decided that we needed to go to the hospital. I said to him that I was disappointed I would not have the birth I have always dreamed of, but we were getting the baby boy we had dreamed of, and that was what was most important. We were both incredibly calm about it, knowing that it was the right choice for us.  

            We got to the hospital and went through a good hour of processing and the doctor telling us our options and such. During which I wanted to yell: blah, blah, just give me the Pitocin and epidural, we’ve already made our decision! I think around 7 or 8 we finally got going on the Pitocin and got the epidural. One of the worst parts about the whole labor: the stinging from the numbing stuff for the epidural! Gosh, that was painful. Alex was facing the anesthesiologist as he did all his work, holding me, and I almost had to ask him to close his eyes because his energy was so anxious as he watched all the big ol’ needles going into me! It was a very different experience than laboring naturally at home, where I felt nothing but peace, calm and support from him. From there we were able to sleep for a couple of hours and I got a break from the pain. I wasn’t a fan of not being able to move my legs, especially after being so mobile while laboring at home. I also HATED all the stuff that was attached to me! IV, two monitors on my tummy that were itchy, THREE plastic bracelets on my wrist (THREE?!) and, worst of all: the dreaded blood pressure cuff. I hated that thing so much.

            The doctor and nurse weren’t super happy with my labor pattern, but I had progressed to a 5 when they checked me first. When I woke up my sister suggested I watch the monitor and start breathing through the contractions as if I could feel them. I think that really helped move my labor along. Also the doctor’s last visit before I got rocking and rolling was a catalyst because I could see the “we might have to do a c-section if you don’t start progressing soon” in his eyes.

            Pretty soon I was at a 6, then 7. The nurse gave me surprised eyes when she checked me and I was progressing so quickly, probably because my contractions were still not super regular. By now I had started to feel the epidural wearing off, and I pushed the button to increase the drugs a few times, but it didn’t seem to help. And I’m glad, because that made me decide that I was getting close enough that I wanted it to wear off.  One of my biggest concerns about epidurals has always been that they take the control away from me because I can’t feel what my body is doing, so I’m super glad that the epidural had worn off almost completely by the time I was pushing – it allowed me to have some semblance of the natural birth that I wanted.  

           

            Not long after that I went through transition. Mostly what I remember is ferociously tearing the blood pressure cuff from my arm, swearing a good few times and sobbing uncontrollably at least twice.

I was at a 9 (maybe he even said 9 ½) and he said he would come back in a little while and check. My midwife came to my bedside and said “you can push yourself to a 10”. So I did – I gave little pushes with each contraction and visualized my baby coming down and my cervix opening. I was pretty exhausted at this point, but determined to not have a c-section, so I kept going. The nurses changed almost exactly at the time I was ready to push, but I’m grateful because the sweet nurse who helped me push was amazing. She was 38 weeks pregnant! Bless her heart. No one timed, but we think it was about an hour and 15 minutes that I pushed.

           

            THAT was a crazy experience. I was hardly aware of any coherent thoughts during that time, other than “I don’t think I can do this” and “I’m pretty sure I’m going to pop my eyes out of my head”. It was pretty frustrating to push, push, push and then have them say, “ok, keep him down on this next contraction”, which translated in my head to “that last push didn’t do it”. I remember between contractions just lying back on the bed and looking at my birth team around me, pleading with them with my eyes. I don’t know what I was pleading for, but I did say out loud to Alex at least once that I didn’t think I could do it. He assured me I could and told me I was the strongest woman he knew.

            I remember the last several pushes before he was really close, taking the deep breath before the push, bearing down and thinking that I wouldn’t be able to push – I was just going to have to skip this contraction, but somehow I was pushing. Finally the nurse called the doctor in and this is the most coherent I was during all of pushing, because all of a sudden there were 20 freaking people in my room, pushing stuff around and talking amongst themselves. Very clearly I thought, “THIS is why I wanted a home birth”. Just another day on the job for these people – only the biggest day of our lives. Alex was really affected by it, too. He said he heard two of the nurses talking like “oh, you HAVE to tell me where you got your hair done!” And two janitor guys coming in to move, like, one trash can. No worries – I’m just birthing a child here, my vagina out for everyone to see. No big deal.

            A few more pushes and all of a sudden I could feel him coming out. They kept telling me they could see the head, could see his blonde(!) hair. This part was so easy for me – it almost seemed like the doctor was doing all the work. Maybe it was just a huge rush of adrenaline but I don’t remember even getting the head out being half as hard as the pushes I had done before that. Then one more little push (I think, maybe the doctor sort of just wiggled him out – that’s kind of what it felt like) and there was my baby boy!

            Such a flood of emotions: relief, love, joy, pride! I looked up and there was Alex at my side, and we cried together as we looked at our precious little son. He was here, he was finally here and he was perfect. 

We're going to have a baby and stuff...

A few people have been asking me to do a pregnancy FAQ post, and since I haven't blogged in 6+ months I figure that is an okay place to start.

What was the reaction when you found out? Well, it was *quite* surprising. We had been off birth control for a year and a half and during that time we had "tried" off and on, I tracked ovulations and such but to no avail. The few months before we got pregnant we even began having conversations like "maybe we're just not ready... maybe we should go back on birth control".  The timing was really not the best, I had just started school with 15 credits, working full time. But now that the surprise is out of the way, I am so grateful for the timing because it means I won't have to be pregnant in the St. George summer, and that is good for all parties involved. I will be completely honest and say that the first week+ after finding out was mostly shock, but I remember one morning looking in the mirror and thinking "I'm finally going to be a mom" and remembering all the times we had wanted it so badly. And of course I cried. I do that a lot nowadays.

Dominant emotions thus far? Like I mentioned - shock. Then bliss... relief that there is "nothing wrong" with my body... excitement. I still see couples out with their kids and think "holy crap, that is going to be us soon." So I'd say another dominant emotion is "holy crap".

Symptoms? I had no symptoms that I thought to be pregnancy before one of my friends finally said I should test, just to be sure.  It was not uncommon for me to be late - I even skipped a cycle all together a few months before. The first thing I noticed was my boobs got HUGE, swollen and even hot to the touch.  I had no nausea until about week 10, and that lasted for about 5 weeks. I still haven't thrown up, although sometimes I think it might have made me feel better.

Any cravings? The only one I can think of as a "craving" would be lime. I loved me some cherry limeaids from Sonic for a few weeks. Other than that it was either "honey, go to Wendy's right now because a baked potato sounds like the *only* thing I can eat!" or I would go to eat something and it tasted like the best. food. ever. Happened with a sandwich first. I kept asking Alex "is this not the best sandwich you have ever had?!" He thought I was a little crazy.

Weight gain? Actually down 5+ pounds since my first 8-week visit. Pregnancy diet is the best because you never ever want to eat. My belly looks a lot bigger to me, but I haven't gained any weight. I can't wait to pop because I feel like I just look fat right now.

Movement? None yet. But it's only 4" right now, today I am 16 weeks.

Boy or girl? I truly don't care, but Alex is really hoping for/convinced it is a boy. He says they are easier. However, we have WAY more girl names than boy names on our list, so if it is a boy we will be in trouble. We will find out in about a month.

How does Alex feel about all this? He couldn't be happier. He was made to be a dad, and he will be so amazing. He has taken such good care of me, I couldn't ask for a better person to accompany me on this journey.

Things I've enjoyed the most so far? There is a human being growing inside of me. I have felt that the baby's spirit does not dwell in the womb through the whole pregnancy, but I have definitely felt it when it has been there. The only way I can describe it is a glowing feeling. The first time I felt it was when we were watching Walking Dead (haha! Sorry, baby, for that to be the first thing you were exposed to, but let's face it: zombies are awesome. We will teach you.)

Things we are looking forward to? A peaceful, natural home birth. Big cheeks to kiss and sometimes pinch. Waiting to see if he/she has Alex's dimples (please, oh please!)

"Empire Records, Open Til Midnight..."

This last week flew by in a blur of crazy.
Monday night we went over to Alex's parents house to help out his dad who is working on a new album! Phil is an incredibly talented musician and I really can't wait to hear all the songs, because the few I did hear rocked my socks off. And the new album will be featuring a bit of yours truly and all the other kids. Just some back-up stuff, but still! I had a ton of fun and it was super nice of Phil to involve us in his pure awesomeness. I'll let you know when the album is done!

Tuesday we had a super yummy dinner with our groovy friends, the Telfords. We sure think they are great, and their little boy is adorable.

Wednesday I watched 4 episodes of Vampire Diaries. And I liked it.

Thursday I had girls night with my homies and then went and purchased flowers for my backyard.

Friday was about the epic-est night I've had in quite a while. I spent pretty much all week preparing and planning. It's what we like to call "Incest Fest", and I know you're jealous.
Every Friday before conference my family gets together and has what we used to call "Adult Night", seeing as how we leave all the kiddos at home and have some fun night with just the adults. Well, every time we said something like "I'm so excited for Adult Night!", it sounded creepily like we were going to be shooting a porno, so we just bagged it all and went with "Incest Fest". Much better.
Annnnnnyway... it was my turn to host and I am pretty sure it rocked. We had an awesome dinner of baked penne, pizza factory breadsticks, baked asparagus and brussel sprouts and a strawberry lassi drink.
Then we played a series of Minute To Win It games, and I think more than one person in my family peed their pants. I should have sent out an "I'm sorry we're going to be so loud tonight" note to all my neighbors before hand. It was an absolute blast.

Needless to say I was quite exhausted come this morning, as I just could not sleep last week (and it doesn't look like I'll be kicking that anytime soon since it's 12:15 and I'm wide awake). I was up until 1:30 and 2:00 every day last week. Yuck.
BUT - thank goodness I had made plans with my mother-in-law to come over - I was able to get my tush in my backyard and plant some flowers! Gosh, I hope they do well and I don't kill them. I'll post pictures later. They are not much to look at right now... hope they get bigger!

Here's hoping I can get some sleep tonight.

Spring is in the Air!

I looooooooove spring! And I am NOT the type of person who adds vowels to words unless she reaaaaaly means it.
The weather has been gorgeous here and I cannot get enough of all the blossoms on the trees and the freshly planted flowers. Daffodils are the cutest little "happy" flower.

On that note, I did work my freakin tush off on Saturday. I felt like a zombie by the end of the day. We worked for hours in the backyard (p.s. I HATE flag stone. If ever you are thinking "flag stone would look nice here" - you are wrong, mister. Dead wrong. It is impossible to keep looking nice). I think we are all ready to plant pretty flowers this Saturday and I am so excited for that.
We got our fire pit / thingy in! Hurrah!! We've been trying to do it for months. It was so easy, really didn't take much time at all.
Don't mind the ugly, un-cared for flagstone.

We are going to have s'mores this weekend! Pictures to come of my soon-to-be-planted flowers up in those terraced spots behind the fire thingy.

Also, we saw Hunger Games over the weekend. It rocked my flippin socks off. I really thought they did an amazing job with it and I loved all the characters - especially Caesar. I pretty much love Stanley Tucci always.

Last weekend Alex's parents took us and the rest of his family to Zion for a night and we had a blast. It was beautiful on Friday and we hiked Observation Point. I am blown away by that place's beauty every single time I go. We don't usually make pricey purchases, but there is an art gallery up there that we really adore and the owner is super nice. You can see his work here.
We fell in love with this gorgeous vase and had to take it home. It is probably the most expensive accessory I have in my whole house :D It is so unique and I don't regret one penny of it.


I love decorating for spring - it is my second favorite, next to Halloween. I still have a few things to put up, but here is what I have so far:



My living room is slowly coming along, and with the recent purchase of this rug I finally feel like the colors are coming together. I am in love with it.


Guess what? I didn't get a killer bruise. No bruise at all. I would say my life is a total waste, but I am currently eating swirly gummy bears, and that somehow makes it all better. Bless you, gummy bears. You are my reason for living.

Happenings

I feel like such a loser always doing "what's been happening lately" posts... do you hate reading them? I just don't know what else to blog about, and I'm feeling bloggy tonight. Maybe it's the menstruation that's got me in the pensive mood (tmi? I don't care, my few readers are most likely girly friends)... (also, side note... I literally had to Google pensive because I kept trying to spell it pensieve like from Harry Potter. Yikes. Thank you, spell check.)

Now... where was I? Yes, menstruating pensiveness.

I don't know what I'm being pensive about. I just know that is the mood I am in. So pretend that my voice is all pensive-y, and I will try to stop using the word pensive. I've always liked that word. Even before Harry Potter skewed it in my brain.

Today I was a ninja at work - in a skirt - and no one even saw. I saved four 10' glass lamps from falling over by performing a graceful leap that sent my right chin colliding in to the base of an 18" thick steel base. I chipped my bright pink toenail polish and I limped for three hours. I BETTER have an awesome bruise. Is that not the worst, when you get a killer wound and then there is this dinky bruise?! I hate that.

Midterms are over with and afterwards I immediately felt the lethargy and apathy kick in. Literally the next day. I am now grateful that I can't take any classes during the summer.

We got our puppy groomed for the first time yesterday. When I got home I was pretty sure we were going to have to change his name - Joey? Steven? Bob? He looks SO different. But SO cute. I love him. Milestone for today: he scratched on the door until I let him out so he could poop. I was giddy with excitement.

In a few weeks I will be awarded 3 weeks paid vacation time from work. What do I do??? I really want to do a trip back east - New York, Washington, D.C., maybe church history. But I feel this dread coming over me that it will all just be wasted on sick days and leaving early on Fridays. Blech.

The last several weeks have been frustrating as we have tried to finish project after project to no avail. Alex was sick last week so we couldn't get anything done over spring break. My kitchen is STILL not finished, and now we are trying to get the backyard done before it gets flippin hot. The failures of the last few weeks have fueled my stubborn determination: this Saturday I will work all. day. long. Who's with me!?!? (please?)

Extraordinary

Yesterday my boss handed me a questionnaire for me to fill out and the first question perplexed me. I skipped it and filled out the easy ones - favorite candy, favorite movie, etc. All throughout the day I kept coming back to the question in my mind, trying to answer it and coming up short.
It was this: "What is your greatest recognition moment?" Basically, "what is your most extraordinary moment?"
I kept thinking to myself, "well, I've never done anything that great. What do I have to be proud of? I've lived in little ol' St. George most my life, got married and settled down, work full time. I never even backpacked across Europe like I always dreamed of."
So I was driving around, zoning, like you do (missed my turn, like I do), and my brain all of a sudden was flooded with extraordinariness! Now, before you start thinking this is quite the vainglorious blog entry, let me express the reason for it. As I started to list my cool accomplishements I realized that I'm posititve everyone has this type of list, you just don't see it! My cool-things list has just become a part of my past, and I don't realize how flippin awesome each thing is! How extraordinary they each are!
So, since you may be thinking "chya right, Jaylyn. You're not even that cool.", here is my evidence:

I jumped out of plane.
I have performed in front of hundreds of people, singing and acting, including a performance in Carnegie Hall!
I hiked Havasupai, and came out alive.
I learned how to drive a motorcycle, and one time I tipped over while I was out cruising and I PICKED.UP.A.MOTORCYCLE. True story.
I have hiked Angel's Landing (this is one of those that did not seem cool to me at all, but how many people worldwide can say this!?)
I witnessed the miracle of birth.
I helped organize and participated in an event to feed hundreds of needy people in our community.
I have loved deeply and had my heart broken.
I repelled from mountains and jumped from 50-foot cliffs in to cold water.
I bought a house.
I left the only home and family I had ever known and moved across the world to a place where I didn't know one person or the language.

I regularly sing at the top of my lungs, dance like a total crazy person, and I love my friends and family fiercely.

I feel like this is just the beginning of a freakin rad list that I will continue to compile throughout my life. I would highly recommend that you 5 people (love ya, by the way) who read my blog do this. It makes you feel like a rock star. I'll end with my favorite quote, which I know I've shared before but I'm pretty sure it can't be over-shared.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

You were BORN to be magnificent! And every one of you IS A ROCKSTAR!! The question is: do you see it?!